Death of a Feminist
Born into the post-women’s rights movement era, I never experienced a time where women were expected to be homemakers and caretakers. Instead, I am in a society where women are EXPECTED to take on the 40-hour work week regardless of their neglected homes, daycare-raised children, and relationship chaos. I cannot help but think this idea of feminine independence has gone too far. Women have fought so hard to be “equal” to men- but have since lost their true origins and instincts. Today’s US culture disrespects and discredits a lifestyle that used to be considered valuable across nearly every culture in history.
Since the women’s rights movement, the consumer market has exploded with products that will make house chores and home duties easier and more efficient. That’s great for the market, but is it good for us and our well-being to spray our house down with chemical fresheners and throw a ficus plant in the corner in place of actually caring and nurturing it? I can not even imagine the amount of money that has been made from toxic cleaning chemicals that “scrub for you,” not to mention microwave ovens, TV dinners, children’s TV programming, and a drug industry that pretends there were never natural remedies or preventative medicine for any dis-ease. A woman’s former livelihood has been replaced with a bunch of crap that promises to make your home life better, easier, and automated. And it doesn’t stop in the home. This need for a certain standard of equality has had a huge effect on our nutrition and diet choices.
When you think about the fast food industry and the foods in the supermarket filled with pesticides, preservatives, and chemical additives, do you ever consider how our nation got to be this way? Why is it so difficult for us to get away from this lifestyle of convenience when we know it is destroying our health? Maybe its good to have someone at home, taking care of a family unit (however conventional or unconventional), maintaining a garden and cooking some home-cooked dinner, be it a man or a woman. Someone needs to do it!
When you look at the feminist movement and the cost of consumerism, you could take the expenses of all the household products marketed to working women, the expense of daycare, eating out, divorces, gas for the daily commute, makeup to hide those dark eye circles from waking up so early to go to work,etc. and if you added it all up, it would cost nearly as much as many women earn at their jobs.
It is absurd that I could get a job in advertising making about $34,000 a year to market products to other working women… and then I can go spend all my hard-earned cash for those same things to make up for the time I do not have to care for my home, health, and happiness. I currently work full time. I am a strong, independent woman. For thousands of years, women from all cultures have developed their inner strengths and individuality outside of the workforce. Ever since cave paintings, our homes have been about so much more than just space — they are a reflection of our true selves.
I have an overwhelming urge to plant, tend, and harvest a garden, cook ridiculously good food EVERY DAY, clean floors while my cat chases the broom, mend clothing, and sew new items and clothes from fabric scraps. I have a strong desire to create homemade medicines, remedies, toiletries, cleaners, and other household products from plants and basic, natural ingredients. I want to eliminate the “need” to buy anything besides basic supplies to make necessary things myself. I am driven to express my love and appreciation for my family, friends, and guests by crafting things for them and finding ways to take care of them…not buy stuff for them.
It seems a lot of our current problems came along with the feminist equality movement, as it marked another large push away from nature. Sure, not all women want to stay at home, and many have great careers that they wouldn’t trade for anything but the attitudes in our culture have tilted so far that many women are miserable in a full-time work environment. They feel it is the only socially acceptable option and the only way to prove their leadership to the current patriarchal society. It is no longer encouraged to have the job of creating, maintaining, and nurturing your family and home. There is no doubt we have come a long way as women. I am happy to have the choice to choose. Today women hold roles as leaders, teachers, and politicians yet we tend to forget that it is just as important to get back to our nurturing roots. We must understand that success doesn’t always come with money and power. There is so much more out there that requires our attention as caretakers and nurturers.
I cannot fight my primal female instincts, they are too strong! Some women try to prove their “strength” by living up to a man’s ideals but we tend to forget that women’s natural strengths are much more powerful. I believe it is superficial not to realize the amazing value that REAL homemakers offer our family units and society as a whole. I’m not talking about the “desperate housewives” who have wealthy husbands and shop for a living, I’m talking about “empowered housewives.” There is a difference. Most women are naturally endowed with gifts of care taking, creating, comforting, aesthetics, and domestic management. Some women are removed from their nature and some are told to reject it. If you are not a domestic goddess and you enjoy your career in the business world, that’s great. But this is a message to all the women who are NOT happy with their jobs primarily outside of their hearth.
The argument that women can “do more with their lives” is true. But how many people actually do more? I sit in an office all day, staring at a computer screen, finding ways to sell people domestic products that they truly wouldn’t need if they had more time at home. This is NOT doing more with my life. It is empty and boring and I would much rather be barefoot in the kitchen.
Wonderful article – I feel exactly the same way. So how do we do it?!
Feminism isn’t about living up to a man’s ideals – it’s about giving women the choice to be whoever they want to be, feminine or masculine or whatever, and be respected for their choice. Consumerism is a different beast entirely. We can’t blame feminism for companies trying to push stuff at us – not when many feminists speak up against sexist and unethical marketing practices.
Yes, feminism IS supposed to be about giving women choices. However, there are a lot of “feminists” out there that actually gone too far in one direction and it leaves me back to feeling as if I didn’t have the choice to be a caretaker. There are too many people who have a distorted view based on overcompensation. Especially in the baby-boomer generation. I have met a lot of resistance from this group to make the choices I want to make, and this frustrates me.
I concur! When people ask me what I want to do once I finish my stint teaching English in Japan, I reply, “Be a stay-at-home mother.” I can’t count how many times I’ve had to defend this to “feminists.” Why would I not want to pour my entire being into caring for the people most dear to me? By spending all (or nearly all) of my days helping to make my family and myself healthy and happy, they will pass on that joy to others in their lifetime. I can think of nothing more important.
Luckily, I have found a partner who whole-heartedly agrees and would rather live a bit more frugally and be more emotionally rich than see me try to balance parenting and a career! I understand that many families (especially in a one parent home) don’t have that option, and that is a very unfortunate by-product of our current society. For a country whose politicians are constantly expressing the need for “Family Values,” we’ve certainly let them slip down to the bottom of our list of priorities.
I think I can be an educated and independent woman and still be a mother and wife. I know that maintaining a family will be one of the most fulfilling things I will ever have the privilege to do, and I am so glad to have that option!
I can’t believe what I am reading. Feminism is not responsible for the chemical overload in our food and cleaning products, nor has it made all women into robots who throw a TV dinner into the microwave every night. I don’t even understand how you made this correlation. Furthermore, not all women are “naturally” or “instinctively” nurturing caretakers. I’m not, for example. Don’t get me wrong. I love to garden and tend to my pets, but I’m not terribly interested in cooking beyond the bare minimum any human being should know, nor am I too keen on having kids. AND I am very eco-friendly and against all the chemical crap and vanity-stroking products a lot of people claim to “need” in their lives. I live frugally. BUT GUESS WHAT– I’m still a feminist! It seems to me that you don’t really understand what feminism is– or the people you’ve met who claim to be feminists don’t know what it is. Both are likely. Feminism is not one worldview or way of thinking. It is MANY philosophies and viewpoints that is diverse as women are. Some women want to be homemakers, some don’t. And hey, that’s fine by me. But it’s not okay to suggest that women are oppressed by their choices, which is what bothered me about your article. You seem to be suggesting that most women would rather just “stay at home” and cook and clean, which is BULL. If you turn to your own life, for example: are you not an entrepreneur? You design, craft, and sell products. Are you not also a businesswoman? Perhaps you should expand your definition of what it means to have a career! Not all careers are boring and not all of them involve cubicles.
Just my .02 cents.
of course there are a lot of definitions of feminism. The one I am talking about is the one of the baby boomer generation. These are the people who keep telling me I “can’t” be this and I “can’t” do that. I am talking about all the people who have taken the concept of feminism and gone too far with one aspect of it, leaving me feeling as if it is not acceptable to be what I want to be. Actually, I think everything you are ranting about is carefully explained from my point of view above and that you should try reading it a little better. I am not suggesting you quit whatever it is you’re doing and start cooking. I am speaking from my own experience and from the situation I have found myself in- in my own life. And I KNOW there are others that are having the same problem I have. Yes, I am an entrepreneur (of homemade products made from natural materials), and yes, I plan to do more beyond homemaking, but I am trying to reach out to anyone who has the same instincts I do and empower them to go against society’s current expectations.
It is wonderful to see the different responses from everyone. This is, no doubt, a touchy subject and I am glad to see passion coming from all sides. :) Feminism has altered predominant perspectives within Western society immensely . Activists have campaigned for women’s legal rights, for abortion rights, for reproductive rights and rights to quality prenatal care; for protection of women and girls from domestic violence, sexual harassment and rape; for workplace rights, maternity leave and equal pay; and against other forms of discrimination. All of these have made women who they are today – strong, independent females and we are totally on a progressive journey.
There are so many different ways to see how we got where we are and I think because we all have different upbringings and relationships, we see things differently – especially when it comes to such a wide range of feminist beliefs. Feminism has branched out in so many sectors including Eco-Feminism, Difference Feminism, which is similar to the discussion I think, Domestic Feminism, Separatist Feminism, Material Feminism, and even Pro-Life Feminism – the term is used in such a broad language and it can be hard to share one voice.
I think we are all happy to have the rights and choices that we have today as women yet sometimes I personally feel that I might be repressing some of my instinctual feminine qualities and my relationship with Mother Earth due the fact that I am trying to keep up with “the Man”. This is especially so when it comes to the workforce. As Tiara said, “Feminism isn’t about living up to a man’s ideals – it’s about giving women the choice to be whoever they want to be…” and I am in no way judging your character Tiara, more so the concept because I have always gone on thinking the same – it truly is about giving the woman a choice of her own – yet I can’t help but think I am constantly trying to prove myself at some point. It is like the yin yang philosophy – you can’t have good without bad, you can’t have strength without weakness. It becomes so easy to compare your strengths against that of a man’s, or better yet, a woman’s. Why are women constantly competing and comparing themselves to the next? A few women might be confident enough to let that stream of thought pass by, but a majority of women still do not have that sense of self and confidence. Are we looking through our own eyes or the eyes of a man’s ideals?
I have always kept up physically, logically, athletically, ect., but sometimes I wonder who I am keeping UP with and why? We are compared to boys at such a young age throughout grade school, sports, intellect, intelligence; It is hard not to think up some sort of comparing and contrasting thought. Women are such beautiful creatures with an amazing amount of power, much different than that of men! :) The differences we share are wonderful and make us our own individuals. I see that there are still many issues that I feel that I am being negatively suppressed, but those are issues that I personally have because of the way I am impacted or affected. As females, we have come a long way and still have a long road ahead of us. I still strive to make progressive breakthroughs and impactful changes for myself with others in mind, in hopes that it is helping other women too. They have their own experiences and might see things differently – As long as we can work together and support one another as strong females, rather than focus on the term “feminists”, I think we will always work for positive improvement and free choice, whether it be staying home in the kitchen, traveling the world with your partner, helping female prisoners of war, legalizing abortion, or becoming president.
Thank you again for all of your comments! I would love to hear your feedback. :)
I’ve thought about this article deeply and I have decided to calmly explain what upset me about it.
I think, Jessica and Jill, that you’re both entering very tricky territory with statements like women are “naturally” nurturing, or women “repress their natural feminine traits.” First of all, what is your definition of “feminine”? The things you define as “feminine” are stereotypes, Jill, plain and simple. Many people believe them to be real, and that is just living proof of their power. We all still live under these illusions, that men are women are just “different.” Are they really different, or is this just hundreds of years of social conditioning that has yet to be undone? Yes, women are biologically different in that many women can have babies– but that does not mean all women can or want to have children. Not all women can or want to care for others. Not all women can or want to be “domestic goddesses.”
“Feminine” gender roles were defined by MEN to keep women running the household– docile and sheltered, and, let’s face it, living your life indoors would be BORING. Every woman needs something to empower her, be it an etsy business or an exciting hobby that gives her an identity. This is just a BASIC premise of feminism from the classic but outdated “Feminine Mystique.”
I also think it is a mistake to blame the fact that people cannot spend more time in the domestic sphere on FEMINISM. To me this is more a labor/Marxist issue. Why are you not questioning how men are never at home, either? I don’t think it is a problem with feminism that PEOPLE (both men and women) have no down time to relax or be at home– that is a problem with the American lifestyle, an obsession with getting money, status, and stuff, and the lack of decent compensation for people’s work. I agree with you that people are oppressed by their work, but I also think this is everyone’s issue, not just women. I think there are plenty of men out there who would rather be relaxing than in some office cold calling.
I think we should ALL value women working– whether they work as a CEO or a homemaker– as women are all valuable and have much to offer. I, for one, am actually grateful that you can write something like this and I can blatantly disagree, because it proves how women now have options that they never had. Women can run for president, or women can be housewives.
Finally, I would just like to say that you’re right, a lot of people don’t value women who work inside the home– but those people are not true feminists, as they have not come to understand that women have diverse needs and desires. Women have to be strong– they have to follow their dreams REGARDLESS of what people say to them! Remember, there are always naysayers in life. If we listened to stupid people all the time who told us not to follow our dreams, then we wouldn’t get anywhere.
men and women ARE different. this is not social conditioning, it is a fact. There are major exceptions and varying degrees of “different” and trust me, I love androgyny! I am saying I want domestic peace to be important again. Women were the ones who used to maintain this (and yes I do believe most of us are naturally endowed with the ability, just like we are with the ability to house a baby) and since women abandoned this important job there has been a lot of chaos, and I truly believe they are in many ways linked. It is okay if you are single, but for couples, families… It really is necessary that someone nurtures the home, and I did say that this includes men. I really hope you can see the overall message (and not pick apart details) and understand that I am not interested in a discussion of the meaning of feminism, I am trying to restore the importance of domestic peace, DIY, anti-consumerism, and good health by pointing out that our society places too little value in the role women used to play, largely in part to the rebellion to it caused by the feminist movement. This has resulted in many women- including myself, feeling as if this is an unacceptable lifestyle option, much like it used to be if a woman wanted to be in the workforce.
How exactly are men and women different? The problem is it is NOT a fact. I am arguing my points from a framework of feminist theory, but I can’t really understand where you’re coming from with your ideas. There is a lot of chaos out there, but what I’m having trouble with is your assertion that FEMINISM is to blame for all that chaos.
Have you ever read Judith Butler, specifically her ideas about the performativity of gender? Not gender roles, but actual GENDER. It is fascinating reading. Butler argues that GENDER itself is socially assigned, and does not stem from actual “differences” between men and women. Butler is a highly respected feminist scholar, and I’m pointing out this example in order to show you that many people do NOT think that men and women are essentially different.
men and women have a major difference in DNA. They have different bodies. Women’s bodies are designed for childbearing. men and women have very different chemicals and hormones inside their bodies/brains, causing them to feel and react in different ways. women have been caretakers since long before gender identity existed. I didn’t blame feminism. I blamed the feminist movement. different things. you are coming at this from wayyyy too left-brained of a standpoint for me. understand the concept, do not get caught up in definitions of individual words that are taken out of context. It will cause an argument that goes nowhere.
I’m actually tickled that you called me left-brained (a first!). Ironically, you’re arguing that men and women are different from a biological standpoint (that seems fairly left-brained to me, actually).
I think you’re missing what I’m trying to say. That’s probably my fault, though. You’re blaming FEMINISTS (that make up the movement) rather than FEMINISM, right? Okay, that makes a little bit more sense except that FEMINISTS are just as diverse as the principles behind feminism. I gather your qualms are with “second-wave” feminists, but I am still having trouble understanding why, as feminists are the ones who dictate what feminism is. If you read any feminist scholars who are active and writing today, you’d see that none of them are devaluing women’s roles in the past. I think the trouble is the so-called “feminists” you’ve dealt with have no idea what they’re talking about and have never actually read any feminist texts, but are just spewing banal pop-feminism they heard on TV about how women who work inside the home, homemaking, are weak and not valuable.
Radical feminists in the 1970′s were actually some of the first women to understand that women who worked inside the home were EXTREMELY valuable, but they also pointed out that many women who worked inside the home, as homemakers, were being taken advantage of by society and by their husbands, because so many of them did have outside jobs and were not being paid for their work at home, so in reality many women had an 80 hour work week. It is backbreaking work to run a home smoothly, as most feminists will tell you. However, I think it is ludicrous to say that women would prefer to be homemakers full time while men work and bring home the bacon. That didn’t work in the 1950′s– women went CRAZY, hence the “Feminine Mystique” was written, and the feminist movement began. That doesn’t mean people don’t value women who are homemakers. I value them very much! But it also means that we can’t go back to the way things were in the 1950′s, because it didn’t work then and it certainly wouldn’t now.
I STILL think you’re directing a lot of misguided energy at Feminists rather than at our capitalistic society. I don’t think the two are connected.
Oh, this will be my last point. I think it’s an important one.
The ability to have children does NOT translate into the “feminine” desire to be a homemaker. That’s a fallacy.
no i am definitely talking about the cultural feminist movement in our country, and the majority of the population does not follow your college textbooks in the meaning of feminism, sadly. I understand you have read a lot on the subject but this has nothing to with the philosophies you have been reading, this has to do with real life. I am not going to argue with you anymore because I am exhausted from your ability to take everything I am saying out of context and turning it into completely different meanings such as “the ability to have children translates into the feminine desire to be a homemaker.” Did I say that? no. you combined two different things I said in two different places, and this is not the first instance of it.
Jill, I found this article by following links on your etsy interview. I LOVE this article and am going to share it with all my friends on facebook. Agree with you 1000%. Well said.
i can’t entirely agree with this statement or article but i do understand where you’re coming from. today’s modern view of feminism dictates an extremist view that creates a stigma on this beautiful, progressive ideal that all women should be empowered to advocate. homemakers should not feel like they are less than a career woman, nor should a career woman feel less than a homemaker. both have something to contribute to society, and it would be a great loss if one were to win over the other.
but it’s also important to think about how the feminist movement began. it was precisely because women were limited to the homemaker role; unequal shifts of power between a stay-at-home woman and a money-making man finally compelled western women to speak up for themselves. therefore, i think that it would be tragic to forget that while women have progressed, we have not reached that status where women are equal to men. there is still a glass ceiling to overcome; and while homemakers deserve their power, career women cannot be undermined to go backwards to a place and time where less power/rights are achieved.
her comment on not being fulfilled at her job cannot be entirely blamed on feminism. she should look at her own ideals and not what society dictates for her. i think that she is confusing her lack of purpose with the ‘death of the feminist movement’. IN FACT, her frustration speaks to the matter of a glass ceiling that still exists for women. to give up and say that a cubicle job is the best thing she has to offer is pessimistic, and also tragic. it’s all about overcoming those barriers and being happy with who you are, as a woman, a mom of two or an executive of a company….
but a cool article :) definitely a good topic!
It’s not true that women have always been “outside the workplace.” Before the Industrial Revolution, for most people the *home* was the workplace. Building factories meant that only half as many people could be employed; since we had a patriarchy in place, guess which half was automatically picked. They didn’t care back then about kids in factories, in fact they had child labor in those same factories, so it wasn’t a matter of who was going to stay home with the children–any kid who’s been weaned can be raised by either parent, or even grandparents or aunts or uncles. No, they picked the guys for the factories just because they thought the guys were more worthy.
Look at what happened after WWII. Women finally got to prove themselves en masse as being good factory workers and they were the backbone of this country and what did they get? Pink slips, and I don’t mean the kind you wear. Can’t have people with XX chromosomes taking up all the good MEN’S jobs when “our boys” were coming home from the war and needed work.
Modern feminism arose from industrial society and industrial culture. That’s the context in which it works. Feminism didn’t bring us industrial work, industrial products or industrial food. Industry did that. Factories did that. I’m getting a little tired of feminists being blamed for everything. The fact remains that home-work is still seen as “lesser,” still does not pay, and therefore still leaves us vulnerable to every little thing that men do.
Don’t mistake me, I’m a SAHM. I LIKE being a SAHM. I believe in raising my own children, I will be homeschooling my daughter and I can’t afford to pay a maid to do what I am supposed to be doing. But that doesn’t mean I’m blind to the reality. I’ve *been* in the position of having the rug pulled out from under me because I rebelled against going to work when I had a child at home, and therefore didn’t have enough job experience or good pay history. It took me years to recover, here it is ten years gone now and I’m still not there yet.
But. The real problem is not feminism. Feminists themselves are often confused as to what the real problem is. Yes, we need to be considered equally worthy with men. That is what equality is all about. Things like rape and molestation and unequal pay for equal work and unfair political representation and crappy treatment by religious groups… those all need to go away. Feminism at its best fights against those things. Women went to jail to help us secure our right to vote, among other things. Mother’s Day began as an anti-war protest because what mom wants her kids to go off and get killed?
The real problem is the industrial age. The real problem is thinking everything can be done by or made by a machine. It cost jobs and now it’s costing us self-respect and health. But I don’t think people are going to have the political courage of a real Luddite to do something about it. They’re too hypnotized by the pretty gadgets. You and I included. We’re here talking about this on the Internet, right?
I think the problem is with consumerism not feminism. I do get your point though and I have felt the same way you do. I am a stay at home mom, not a baby boomer and not a young parent either. Many people ask me when will I be going back to work. I am not.
The baby boomers are having a hard time with your article because of what they and their mothers went through to get them to where they are now. There is a clash of young people not wanting what their mothers did and I think it’s being taken in the wrong way. Everyone still needs to be respectful to the feminist movement.
I completely agree with this article. I’m not yet old enough to be a wife and mother but when it comes to choosing a college and a major I feel the pressure of competition. When people ask me what I really want to do and I say “be an educated homemaker” many people look down on me. Schools push the need for a career so much that it feels like failing to not want to be a doctor or a business woman. Other females think that I am betraying them to want to go back to the stereotypical roles. It may have nothing to do with feminism, or consumerism, but I have to fight with the views of my generation that say that I am taking a step back from progress.
I can really understand what you were thinking when you wrote the
article. I had exactly the same thoughts – when I was about 16 years
old… Fortunately I had the opportunity to learn a lot and study
biology and psychology and sociology and I had the freedom to get to
know my self, my female part and my male part and my bisexual orientation.
First of all I see, that your arguments are not really thought through,
because as Lauren has noticed, you really get contradictory at some point.
As for the differences between men and women (and the funny left-brained
argument) I have to say: Mens and Womens brains don’t look or work that
different, people were trying to find differences to explain the
different behavior, but besides a slight different in size, no other
differences could ever be proven (and there is no such thing as a
reasonable left and a creative right hemisphere… there are differences
between left and right, but most of all the brain works as a network and
complicated functions need parts everywhere in the brain)
I would never say, that there are no differences between men and women,
but I don’t know if there really is such a strong biological base for
these differences. Sure, you can argue for example: the more
testosterone – the more aggressive > but thats true also for women. And
men have more muscles and therefore can do some work better than women
(and also misuse this power to suppress women) and here are thousands
and thousands of years of history, where these small differences lead to
a complex social structure with exactly defined role models. (f.
example: men probably had to suppress their emphatic parts because they
had to kill animals for food (which is a work, that needs a lot of
muscles)… On the other hand it’s much more important for a woman to be
emphatic and to act with responsibility, because she has to raise the
children if the man disappears after you got pregnant…
(It’s really interesting to see which role models develop among animals
with different social systems of raising offspring)
One difference between men and women that seems the most obvious to me
is mental flexibility. But there are also thousands of evolutionary
important reasons that made this difference occur.
I agree with you when you say, that there are a lot of women who have
this special sense for nature and family and “gaia” – but I don’t think
that this sense is unique to women. After all i think feminism and later
emancipation also lead to the possibility and freedom for men to
discover these powers in themselves. It lead to a general melting of
radical constraints.
I know the feminists you’re talking about, the ones that make you feel
bad for doing some gardening. (Where I live we have some politic parties
which fight for the changing of the painted bicycle on the
bicycle-routes into a unisex bicycle (because now it’s a mens) well,
don’t they have more important things to think about?)
All in all, I think the things I’ve learned during the past 10 years
lead me to the following conclusion:
Yes, there are male and female traits, but most of them have a social
and not a biological base. Each and everyone of us has some male and
some female parts and we all have these traits in different proportions.
I know many women who love to work with computers, do the mathematical
stuff, never played with dolls, hate to cook but really love children.
On the other hand I know men that are really flexible, love to do
creative things like music, painting, even sewing and millinery.
And actually it’s this freedom that feminism and emancipation brought to
us: We now have the permission to find out which proportions of what we
have in us, and we can try to live our lives the way that makes us
happy. This is the same for men and women. The happiest couples I know
are these where both partners work part-time and both have a lot of time
to spend with children and hobbies and whatever. The challenge is to
find out what’s best for oneself and to manage to live a life where no
part has to be suppressed.
I don’t think that only the women were unhappy before the emancipation,
but men too had their restrictions.
I think it’s important to look at everything and everyone with a lot of
differentiation and not fight against or for the extremes. Everyone has
to learn these things for him- or herself and if we let ourselves
manipulate by extremists of any kind, then we don’t know who we are and
what we are really worth or where we want to be going with our lives.
hi jill, i found this article through your etsy website as well, and ultimately, your blog, which is fabulous.
i think the “problem”, personally, is labels themselves. we must be feminists. we must be workers. we must be consumers. we must be this. we must be that.
what i got from your article is that we, as women, humans, whatever, have gone from trying to fit into box after box. so while some may not see the inherent, or even visible differences in men and women, i personally do not see the difference in one label over another. feminist/worker/man/woman/consumer…these are all labels, words that keep us from living from a real authentic place, being who we are at the centre of our beings.
i completely agree with you jill, on a very personal level. i have a driven, intrinsic need to care for my son, grow my own food, make my own potions, and generally live by the beat of my own drum.
i don’t think blaming consumers, feminists, capitalists, or you, for that matter, really addresses the issue at hand, which seems to be living truthfully, without recourse. i do find it ironic that you feel “judged” by feminists, and those present “defending” this particular view of feminism are judging you and your thoughts, to the point of abuse, in some cases.
bravo to you for sharing your thoughts, and bravely and eloquently choosing to share your personal story in a society where there is little compassion or empathy.
i choose to look past dogma and semantics, and feel blessed in knowing there is a kindred spirit out there in cyberspace…
thanks jen! and yeah, I think you’re right!